One of the big problems with verbal and emotional abuse is that it is progressive. It happens mildly, jokingly, and infrequently at first and then it increases. It becomes more frequent and more severe, with moments of explosiveness. The explosive phases are followed by honeymoon phases where the abuser is apologetic and loving. This cycle continues and many victims become so accustomed to the verbal and emotional attacks that it sadly becomes acceptable. Their self-esteem gets lower and lower. This is exactly what happened to me…
Years of emotional, verbal, and other abuses led me to not expect any better for my life. I had always hoped for the best—but settled for much less. Even though many family members and friends saw the abuse, “abuse” was an unspoken word. Also, I did not even identify it as abuse. I accepted it as part of married life. I had vowed “for better or worse…for richer or poorer” and I was determined to do everything possible to make my husband happy, despite his abuses which included several adulterous affairs. I believed that marriage was forever. I did not realize that God does not expect you to live in those situations. God does not want you to be abused, and He allows for divorce in cases of adultery. The following scriptures refer to these situations…
“I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife (or her husband), except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman (or man) commits adultery.” (Matthew 19:9 NLT)
“Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.” (Colossians 3:19 NLT)
God did not make my husband abuse me or commit adultery. However, when my marriage fell apart, God orchestrated my steps as I leaned on Him to put the broken pieces of my heart and my entire life back together. He once spoke to me audibly. He answered my questions and made His Presence known in multiple ways. He told me that He had “rescued me from Egypt.” I then realized, that I did not even know that I was in “Egypt” or even needed “rescuing.” I had accepted my abusive situation…but God did not. God rescued me!!! And, what He did for me, He will do for others…
More of Secret Angel’s story to follow!!! Let Secret Angel know what you think of her story.
IF ANYONE NEEDS PRAYER, EMAIL SECRET ANGEL AT secretangel.ps911@gmail.com
The Abuse Expose' with Secret Angel 
Pingback: HE LIFTS US UP: Thanks for Rescuing Me! (Psalm 30:1) | ChristianBlessings
the verbal and mental abuse when I was a kid was worse than any physical beatings…in fact, I used to wish privately for physical abuse…since I figured I could handle a black eye better…..then I spent my days feeling ashamed for actually “wishing” for physical abuse…does any of that make sense?
It sure does… I have repeatedly said that I would have definitely healed faster if I had been physically shot and stabbed than all the threats with the verbal/emotional/psychological abuse that I suffered. What many do not realize is the power of the spoken word… these abusive words are like knives cutting down to the spirit and soul of a person causing deep wounds. Only God can see these wounds but they are actually there. That is why you felt like this…
Prayers for inmates in isolation in NC are always welcomed, especially as we shouldn’t be in here. One can never get enough prayers. Thank you for offering, and for working to raise awareness about how words are just as dangerous as physical weapons. I had to learn this, as well. It is a vicious cycle, and, until we receive unconditional love and become aware of how we were hurt, we often can’t stop hurting others. Prayers are a form of unconditional love, and very helpful. Blessings…
Thank you and …Yes, you are so correct. It is a vicious cycle. Until that cycle of abuse is broken, it will continue to wreck havoc in many lives. So many do not realize the power of the spoken word and speak death and destruction to their own children instead of building up with positive and encouraging words. Please read my previous post, Abusers! Previously called Victims…
It speaks of the cycle of abuse and that abusers learned their behaviors from being abused themselves therefore they were victims. This cycle has to stop.
I can tell that you have a repentant heart and I can tell you that God uses those who have been through tribulations to comfort those in like tribulations. He will use those in your situation who truly seek Him for prison ministries to reach out to others. Here is a link to a prison ministry that I have connected to. I pray for the broken, wherever they may be, everyday that God will transform lives and bring healing and restoration. I will be praying for you and your family. Many blessings to you!!
Also please contact Empty Prisons Ministry…
http://emptyprisons.wordpress.com/
Thank you for the connection. Yes, there were things I had done wrong, mostly from the way I was raised, as well as the extreme pressure from my ex-wife via using our children as pawns to cause distress, havoc and utter chaos in my home with my current wife and children. I never commited the charges that were placed against me by the lies my daughter told to get the freedom of living with her mother, who is very disturbed. That has been the hardest part of being here, knowing that my own children were emotionally damaged by her own damage to destroy me and any hope of the children having a safe and productive life. We are working now to get the truth told, and to eventually get hope and help for all of my children who were perpetrated on by both her and her boyfriend, and then each other as we tried to get therapy for the whole family over a decade, but no one ever really tried to help us. The mental health system is non existent in the south especially, but even in PA there were no beds to have my oldest son commited for his trauma and eventual perpetrationof some of my other children. We are working to get help and justice…it is very sad that we couldn’t get more help from the system, which gets its money from keeping children damaged instead of helping them heal. Everyone watched us fail. We just keep praying…thank you for yours…blessings.
Trust in the Lord… He knows all truth. I pray that the truth will be exposed no matter who was the culprit… that all things done in darkness will be brought to the Light… There is healing in the Light. Keep your eyes on the Lord, laying all of your problems at His feet everyday, and praying to the One who can right any wrong. He gives Divine Favor. He heals the broken. He delivers and restores. Praise Him even in your situation for He draws near. He knows all hearts so give your heart to Him. He is the Key to all of our problems. Blessings to you!
wishing you all continued strength in 2014
Thank you so much. Many blessings to you!
Pingback: Thanks for Rescuing Me! (Psalm 30:1) | The Christian Gazette
Pingback: Prayer for the Rescue of all Victims | Inspirational Christian Blogs
Pingback: RESCUED!! When I Did Not Even Know That I Needed It! (Updated) | The Abuse Expose' with Secret Angel
Pingback: Happy Anniversary to The Abuse Expose’ with Secret Angel | The Abuse Expose' with Secret Angel
Reblogged this on Madison Elizabeth Baylis.