Domestic Violence Day 1: Verbal Abuse

For October’s Domestic Violence Awareness Month, I want to  post or re-post information and stories about the many abuses of the world. There are so many victims across the world of various abuses, but every abuse leads to the same thing…a wound within each person. Then each wound leads to the same thing…a brokenness as the wounds pile up on each person.
I don’t know how many people will relate to this, but I feel that many people feel that verbal abuse is nothing. Most of us were raised hearing, “Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words will never hurt you.” Well, words do hurt! Words cut deeper than a knife! How many of us are stabbing others with our words?

Well, here goes… Day 1 of the DV series, VERBAL ABUSE:
You are so stupid!
You are so crazy!
You are nothing!
You are pitiful!
You are fat!
You are a disgrace!
You are a joke!
No one wants you!
No one wants to be near you!
No one wants to hear what you have to say!
No one wants to see you!
No one will ever marry you!
It’s all your fault!
You never do anything right!
I could just slap you!
I could cut your throat!
I could shoot you!
I could kill you!
I will kill you!
You better always watch over your shoulder, cause one day when you least expect it…

These are just a few of the things that I have been told over the years. These words that cut deep, where no human could see with the naked eye… But the wounds were there!!!
We can all fill in the blanks for the things that we have been told:
You are ________!
No one _________!
It’s ___________!
You never ______!
I could ________!
I will _________!
Anything negative, that “tears down” and does not “build up” is considered abusive.
We all need to watch what we say to our children and each other.. It is easier to raise a child up right than to have to fix them as adults…
This is a previously written entry if you want to read more:

33 thoughts on “Domestic Violence Day 1: Verbal Abuse

  1. It`s true, many people do not realise the danger of verbal abuse, it is expected that they could just be easily forgotten, they are only words after all. Thank you for drawing attention to this serious issue. Your blog is amazing, you give people like me the courage to stand up and confront what has happened.

    • Thank you so much for your encouraging words. Abuse is a serious problem leading many to brokenness where they even accept other abuse as normal. I know that’s what happened to me as I went down a path of destruction that started with words spoken over me. Thanks for following! May God pour His blessing over you!

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  10. Can you imagine Secret A, how much abuse Jesus had to endure, even His own family accused Him of being mad but He knew who He was and He still died for those who rubbished and abused Him and for all those who would in the future and for everyone in the world , past , present, future, we can all accept His free gift of Salvation.

    I was Ministering to Atheists and was often in tears, No it did not concern me what they called me and I’m the same with those who have been close to me, I know who I am in God’s eyes, I’m His Priceless Treasure (see link below) God thinks I’m beautiful, He sees me how I will be and Loves me now as I am, He calls me precious. But it cut deep to hear them mocking God and His Children, my Brothers and Sisters in Christ Jesus, we are family, some of these mockers even claimed to be Christian.

    God’s Priceless Treasure –

    A friend said to me, God is big enough to take care of Himself and this is True, He tells us He laughs at what they say about Him, meaning He does not take it to heart… but my friend Secret A. how would you feel if someone rubbished those you Love deeply… Jesus got the whip out!

    I have been abused and also with Blogging, people have slandered me mostly behind my back, without even knowing me, it was why Ron joined me and continues to support me in my Blogging, he hated their put downs of me as a person of worth but also felt sorry for them in their foolishness. Ron like us all has weaknesses and shortcomings but he is very loyal in his heart to me. I now take more care in my response to others, knowing many recent correction, even Godly correction but I still stand firm on God’s Truth as He empowers me to do so.

    Stick and stones, meaning physical abuse will indeed harm us but verbal abuse, name calling, slander, critical gossip etc, will only hurt us if we accept it and if we don’t forgive those who do it to us . Yes immaturity means some will take it to heart, I use to be very hurt too and I’m not saying it’s ok, God tells us it’s not, we just don’t accept it and so wear it . Spiritual immaturity as Paul said, causes people to slander and abuse others and so their victims often do the same … Hurt people Hurt people unless they forgive.

    I think worse then abuse is Apathy, even God tells us those who are lukewarm will be separated from Him, their choice not His, it is not His will anyone perishes but He hates all sin, those who claim to be Born again Christians but do as the world does, leave a sour taste in His mouth, which can only be removed by their heart repentance and turning away from evil and doing good by The Spirits empowering.

    Christian Love Always from both of us -Anne

    • Hi Anne. I am so sorry that you were cyber-bullied. All bullying hurts its victims. But I am glad that Ron stood by you to help. I am sorry if I have said anything to offend you as my purpose is not to offend anyone but to write as God puts in my heart. I have come a long way from the brokenness of my past where every word cut deep. It is only through Christ that we overcome the wounds of our past. I have to hang onto Him as I walk with Him, especially with the nearing of my book release. Many will not like the revelations and honesty in it, but God co-authored as He gave me the words to write. He told me as I wrote it, “My Tongue is the pen of a ready writer.” I know that family and friends may not like it but I have to walk in obedience as God leads me. I pray for victims and abusers everyday, that God will touch hearts and turn hearts to Him for He is the Key to everything in this Life. Many blessings to you, my friend Anne and your lovely husband, Ron. May God pour His blessings onto you both!

      • Hi Secret A, no you didn’t say anything that offended me, I just wanted to share another view that is a reality in my life now, it needs to be because when you stand up for God’s Truth it means abuse of some type.

        I think you have a wonderful Loving heart Secret A, I was encouraged to hear you pray for the vand abusers too, unless they come to heart repentance they will be lost, God can’t force them to repent and accept Salvation but He can show them their need for Salvation , then it’s their choice.

        I haven’t shared with you about the abuse I received from my first husband , I will if wanted and I’ll also share how God helped me, to walk through it.

        I’ll see you tomorrow – Christian Love from both of us – Anne

      • Hi Anne. I am so sorry that you were abused by your first husband but thank God that He brought you a Godly husband in Ron. I pray for my future husband as I wait on the Lord for only He knows everyone’s heart. Now, God has put it in my heart to pray for all victims as well as the abusers. Too many Christians forget that we have to reach out to all people and forget that the abusers were once victims. That is where they have learned their behaviors. It does not excuse their actions as abuse is wrong, but it is a spiritual war for the souls of all people around the world and we have to pray for all. Satan is trying to take as many as he can and only prayer will stop him in Jesus’ name. Blessings again Anne!

  11. I worked it out Secret A , there were two Posts with the same picture , with having so many problems in the past I’m thinking they are all related now , please just delete this and the other one in which I told you it had disappeared , I feel so relived it was not the same problem as before.

    Thanks again Secret A.

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