Domestic Violence Day 19: INCEST

According to RAINN (Rape,Abuse, Incest National Network ) , the definition of INCEST is:

“Incest is sexual contact between persons who are so closely related that their marriage is illegal (e.g., parents and children, uncles/aunts and nieces/nephews, etc.). This usually takes the form of an older family member sexually abusing a child or adolescent.”

The laws regarding incest, child sexual abuse, sexual assault, and rape vary from state to state, country to country.  Many cases of incest do not get reported so statistics are not reliable to the actual number of cases.

Unfortunately, many reasons exist that victims may not report incest. Most of these cases, the children are young and may not realize that it is not normal or may have been told that it is normal and every family does it. These victims may not know that they even need to ask for help as children. Many also live in fear after having been threatened or afraid of what will happen to them if removed from their family. These young victims may also fear not being believed or being accused of doing something wrong. The fears that these incest victims face are innumerable.  Compound that with quilt and shame as they realize that it is not normal and not acceptable.

Though all types of sexual abuse in children are devastating with long-term damaging effects, incest is one of the worst forms because it involves the victim’s own family. Even though no child sexual abuse is good, when it involves a non-family member, then the family is there for emotional support for the victim and to provide safety from further violation.  But, when the abuser is an immediate family member, that young victim feels like he or she has no one to turn to and no place of safety. They have no one to trust since the ones who they should be able to trust are the ones harming them, especially if the non-abusive parent has witnessed the abuse and not stopped it for fear of abuse or whatever reason. Some many have also been incest victims or fearful of losing their spouse or may blame the child for instigating it. Whatever the reason, incest is especially harmful to it’s victims.
If you suspect that a child may be in an abusive situation or incest situation, please call Child Protective Services in your area immediately or if they are in immediate danger, call 911.

Reference: http://www.rainn.org/

13 thoughts on “Domestic Violence Day 19: INCEST

  1. Having been one directly affected by this form of abuse at 5 years old I want to thank you for spreading awareness to others. What you are doing is great by informing others about abuse. God bless you

  2. For me I didn’t say anything about my grandfather molesting me because of fear of what would happen to me, him, our family if I told. Children tend to innately take on the role of protector and bear burdens that we shouldn’t in attempt to save the idyllic world we believe in.

    • I am so sorry that this abuse happened to you! I was emotionally abused by my grandfather and I couldn’t even tell anyone so I can imagine with sexual abuse. Unfortunately, the children do take on the role of protector of their families while carrying a load that they should not carry. May God bless you my friend!!

    • Thanks to you too for speaking out. Too many think that we are “crazy” after our attackers get through tearing us down, but cptsd is real. Even though I know that I have been healed, I had a trigger a few days ago just by words that I heard. More people need to know how real this is and is affecting many victims of abuse. Blessings to you!!

  3. Pingback: Domestic Violence Awareness Day 31: The Unofficial Survey | The Abuse Expose' with Secret Angel

  4. I have two sons who were/(are) being molested by their dad. I reported the abuse. my oldest reported the abuse to authorities. Other professionals reported the sexual abuse. professionals reported physical abuse disclosed by child. The courts and DCFS who failed to protect them after reports were made….then took the boys into “Police Protective Custody” and tricked my parents via my own attorney into a supposed 72 hour custody. This turned into a CINC case where the prosecutors and SRS and their contractors kept my sons in custody for at least 18 mos. plus. Many false allegations were made against me and the boys’ family. The perpetrator never had to take the witness stand. He was given all kinds of access to the boys while me and my family were given limited highly supervised contact with the boys. They were given audio evidence (Boys talking about watching child porn and what daddy did with himself during it.) and had a court appointed Forensic Investigative Psychologist report which stated that “There is definitely something sexual that has occurred between this father and these children.” I had hired a GAL during family court who tried to get them out of his home due to other professionals witnessing grooming by dad right there at the visitation center and reports od physical abuse disclosed by all while I had to have supervised visits and they were in his temporary sole custody. Boys exhibited sexual behavior one toward another. They did not invite me to a hearing and as I said tricked us into giving the boys to “72 hour police protective custody.” The case went to Juvenile court, My parental rights were severed and the boys were given back to their abuser. The sexual abuse started at ages 3 and 4. They are now 13 and 14 years old and have been isolated from me, their mother, and their entire family. I took the case to the appellate court and cover up after cover up as well as many violations of rights were done by this court as well. To make matters worse, they have to live in fear of him and there is no ONE to protect them. My son also disclosed sexual abuse to an EMCU detective, a detective in another county, and to me. A stalking order was filed by the perpetrator to continue to keep me from the boys and everyone in the system KNOWS the truth! They have thrown me in jail for trying to protect them and at this point because from the Attorney General’s Office to every attorney in the State area and beyond knows the truth-no attorney will touch this case with a 50 foot pole. How can these boys ever heal from what has/may still be happening to them?! I am a believer in Jesus Christ. I have spoken via internet with one of my sons and he described other sexual things that I knew nothing about. CPS is a mess and many kids are being sexually trafficked within it. Especially ones who are vulnerable to it due to how they were forced to be with this man. I am FED up and I want SOMEONE on the planet to help us NOW!!! I am so sorry to hear of all of the above who have spoken out. My heart goes out to all of you. My heart is broken and I do not know how to keep forgiving when NO ONE will stop this madness! I did what I was supposed to do. Others did what they were supposed to do. I have prayed for all involved. I, as well as other moms, DID believe our children and the majority of the outcomes have been the same! We are called crazy and the abusers are getting custody and using the courts to file stalking charges against us for trying to be in our own children’s lives. Many of you have been victims of this abuse and I HATE what they have done to all of you!!!! May God be with each of you. A mother who does not know how to heal or even begin to understand what you all have endured or for that matter my sons as well. They are being threatened if they show any interest in having a relationship with me, They have been brain washed (traumatic bonding) and have to believe it in order to survive. Any input you can give me from your end is appreciated. Again, God Bless you all.

    • Valerie, I am so sorry that you are in this dreadful situation. This is horrific and should never happen. I pray Psalm 91 over you and your sons, that God will rescue them and protect them. I pray that the truth will be exposed and you will be vindicated and custody restored. I pray for total healing and restoration for you and your sons. I will continue to pray and will petition the courts of heaven to act in the favor of righteousness for all who have been wronged by abuse. Too many victims have been victimized again by the courts and we must pray for the legal system to change. I will keep you in prayer and will have a member of our ministry contact you for further information and attempt to assist you in any way possible. God bless you and your sons!!!

  5. Pingback: Domestic Violence Day 19: INCEST | The Abuse Expose' with Secret Angel

  6. Incest – a father figure is the MOST DAMAGING of all abuses because it effects the soul; Mind, will, and emotions as well as our spirit. It also distorts/damages the child’s view of God and can last a lifetime. We see God through the eyes of our abuser (daddy.) Dad is to be our example of Christ’s love and caring. Blessings to you Angel and thanks for sharing this.

    • That is so true. Yes, we see God through the eyes of our own dad’s… whether good or bad. Too many have been wounded by the actions of their human dads but our God is a good, good Father!!!

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